Dont Know What You Got Til Its Gone

It is indeed a sad day amongst Madison Ave residents and Annex affiliates alike.

Gone are the days of pink walls, strange smells, nature watches and steep staircases. There will be no more Dupont station. No more Final Nine. No more making fun af all the frat and sorority houses because of their strange symbols, the questionable activities of their members and the really bad music that they play at their parties, in which we both secretly wished we copped invites to.

After 8 months this is it. This is the end.

Its been great Madison Ave. Thanks for all the memories. I hope that one day when we share the experience we've had here with our kids, they'll find solace in knowing that you not only housed our physical shells... but our hopes and dreams.

Goodnight, sweet prince.

OMG everybody!!! It's finally here #albumofthecentury

Dear Diary,

After much anticipation and speculation, Watch The Throne was FINALLY released on Monday and it was, well... pretty poo to say the least. I mean of course the production was crisp and all, and that RZA track was ill, but other than that it did nothing for me. Here's a few things that annoyed me about the album;

• Really sub-par rapping



• Synths were relentless and made my ears bleed at times - Especially in that electro-dub-step-ish breakdown in Who Gon Stop Me. Ol' Britney Spears - Hold It Against Me ass sounding mo' fucker



• In New Day, Kanye thinks everyone hates him and his life is really complicated and as a result, reckons if he ever has a son that he's never going to let him go into strip clubs because finding a wifey in there is a really hard accomplishment



• Im going to go out on a limb here and say that rhyming "whatup blud, what up cuz?' with "its all black, I love us" is probably not some of Jay-Z's best work.



• I think a Gucci beat accidentally sneaked its way on track 3 of the album and the two kings just couldn't come hard enough on the track



• The raps weren't any good



• The first Frank Ocean track was good (kinda got that Pray vibe off Jay's American Gangster album) but his second one, Made In America, was some corny ass shit. The soothing background synths and boppy keys reminded me of Blueprint 3's Forever Young and made me want to wave my hands from side to side and/or hug the nearest person to me, which at the time I didn't really want to do.



• Lift Off had Kanye trying to sing again for some reason. No one has a clue what he actually said. Hot 16's are replaced by chilly 4's.



• I had to listen to Otis again

Even after all that, do you know what the saddest thing is Diary? I downloaded the new Chris Breezy mixtape at the same time and even that poor excuse for a record is getting more spins than Watch The Throne. Besides, who wouldn't wanna here Biebs go HAM on the mic. He may rap dirty, but his dicks definitely clean.

Anyways I'm outtie, until next time D.

Dear World, I'm Sorry.

Aaaah... It's a good feeling knowing that you're a good guy, an ever better feeling to know that you're so great that your impact on society will be appreciated by everybody forever. Well by everybody I mean everybody with exception to Nickelback. Fuck Nickelback, They're like Tom Cruise but worse because there is more than one. Fuck Tom Cruise too for that matter, Mission Impossible 4 will suck more balls than the Wolverine movie, which I believe gobbled down on a record 33 sets of balls (66 individual testicles).

Oh yeah so I check my inbox this morning and along with the usual fan mail and debt reminders I get something new. Something which at first I thought was spam, something written to me personally and intended for me to spread to all of our readers and our one follower, which coincidently is me. It was a reply to an e-mail I had sent to Pink. I basically asked her where she got off.

This is what I received in return:

"Dear Jeremy,


Thank you for your letter. I must admit at first I was confused by your question. I didn't know whether you were a fan asking which train station I exited from or a creep getting sexual with it! It wasn't until I asked my good friends Nickelback to clarify what you meant that I realised you were criticising my art.


It prompted some in depth soul searching and I thank you. I came to realise that my music has been polluting the atmosphere for the larger part of my life. My music is pure poo, like sloppy and steamy, the type of poo you need to use a whole roll on and then are left with an inconveniently situated rash. A nagging rash that nothing can soothe. I like to think my voice represents the rash and the sloppy turd is my production. It stinks, it burns and in it's simplest form is just down right unpleasant.


At first I accepted this and moved on but something else was nagging me. Was my music alone the problem? I couldn't possibly see how I could get any worse... but then I did. I endorsed my protégé Adam 'Whadayawanfromeey' Lambert, what the fuck was I thinking. The guy is literally a gay male version of myself. I slapped the world's gay community in the face with that one and I am deeply sorry. My whole image is disturbing, I want to be empowering to women that's why I try to look like a dude? I had Bucky Lasek fist pumping in a film clip.  I am a virus and I have infected innocent people. I initially named myself P!NK because I sported a sweet pink doo. My hair is no longer pink maybe I should boot off. I am sorry.


Jeremy, Please accept this apology if I had a heart it would be aching for the world. I am a cyborg.


Regrettably me,
P!NK"


Wow, that actually happened and if she does boot off you can thank your's truly.